Saving A Relationship 3 Tips For Doing So

Whether you've recently broken up, or you're afraid you're on the brink of a breakup you can take heart, saving a relationship is possible. You can reignite the flame that the two of you once shared. It won't necessarily be easy or fast, but if you're committed to making it work there is hope.

I've compiled a list of some of the things you need to do to salvage and repair your relationship. Keep these tips in mind when you are analyzing your relationship:

1. Do you really want to stay in the relationship? I know this may sound like a dumb question but sometimes when we think we want to keep our relationship what we really mean is that we're afraid of having to find someone new, or starting over. If you're brutally honest with yourself you can determine if you really want to continue the relationship or if you're just scared of being on your own.

Another part of this question is to determine if your partner really wants to work on the relationship too. Even if you decide that your relationship is worth saving, that doesn't mean your partner shares your conviction or will be willing to invest the time and effort to work on your problems.

2. Honestly evaluate what went wrong in your relationship. Again, this will need to be done by both of you. This can be the hardest part, it's always easier to blame someone else for the problems but it's tougher to own up to your part in the break down of your relationship.

Before you can repair it you need to know not only what is broken but why it broke. The two of you may even want to visit a couples counselor to help you objectively work through this phase. Sometimes having an objective third party in the room can help you both stay calm and face things you may not have been willing or able to face on your own.

3. Try to remember what drew you to each other in the first place. If you've been in a relationship for a while you obviously loved and enjoyed each other. So often in a relationship what happens is that the 'stronger' one (or the most selfish one) controls the relationship. They become the one who tends to take more than they give. The other partner will take on the role of the giver. Over time the 'taker' will get bored because the fun loving person they fell in love with has become a doormat and the 'giver' will get sick of not getting their needs met often enough.

If your relationship has fallen into this trap you both need to take a step back and remember what attracted you to each other. This might be a good time to not only remember but to tell the other person. Remind them why you fell in love with them, and vice a versa.

Saving a relationship will take time, work, and commitment by both parties, but it can be done. If you think your relationship is worth saving and your partner thinks so too, than by all means, follow the tips above and you can salvage your relationship.

How To Save Your Relationship After Adultery

After adultery a relationship is the weakest it's ever likely to be, but this can be a good thing. This sounds like it is hard to believe, but the truth is that the time after adultery is also the time that can make or break a relationship, which can be a huge opportunity.

Nobody likes to be cheated on. Nobody should be cheated on. But cheating isn't the problem, it's the symptom. There is always a bigger problem underlying the infidelity and if there's anything good to come after adultery, it's knowing that there is a problem that you need to address.

The time when a relationship is at its weakest is also the best time to do the work that will bring it to being its strongest. There's an idea in the military that you need to tear a person down so that you can build them back up, strong than they ever were before, and this is true in relationships as well.

After adultery what your relationships needs is a complete overhaul. This isn't optional, because if you try to just go back to the way things were, then what you'll find is that history will just repeat itself. You need to start over and build things back up from the bottom. Tear it down to bring it back stronger than it was before.

The first thing you need to do is spend some time apart. This may seem counter intuitive since you're dealing with an after adultery situation, when the urge might be to not let your partner out of your sight for a single second. But the time apart will allow you to see your relationship from a different angle, and this perspective will be important for the relationship repair process.

The next thing you need to do is to figure out exactly what the problem was, and the answer to this question is not 'they were sleeping with someone else'. You need to find the deep down problem that was behind the infidelity, and you need to do something about the problem.

After you've done those two things, it's time for you to start the relationship over. The key part is to do it from the beginning. Go on dates again. Start over just as if you were dating somebody else. You need to treat this as a new relationship because if you want to repair your relationship after adultery, then it has to be a new relationship.

Although you're being building a new relationship after adultery, you do need to keep in mind the problems that made all this necessary. The idea here isn't to have the same relationship you had before, the idea is to have a better one, and this means you need to avoid making the same mistakes.

Rebuilding a relationship after adultery will be hard, but it will also be one of the most worthwhile things you can. Remember, there is help available out there, and seeking it out one of the best things you can do for your relationship.

How To Be A Sweet Girlfriend Without Being Mushy

If you are anything like me, you may have wondered how to be a sweet girlfriend.  I am quite fiery and hot tempered so you wouldn't normally describe me as being sweet.  But seemingly men like that and sometimes quite a lot.

So what do you need to do?  You do not need to go as far as waiting for him at the front door when he comes home but it comes close.  You need to show your man some affection and I don't mean in the bedroom although we will come to that later.  Men like cuddles but only when appropriate, i.e. in private. Public displays of affection tend to embarrass them.

Try taking the initiative and spice up your sex life but subtly is the key.  For example, if you know he is having a hard time at work, why not surprise him with a massage one evening.  Light the candles, slip into something more comfortable and heat up the massage oil.  The temperature is guaranteed to rise. 

Cook him his favorite meal and clean up afterwards letting him have the night off. In other words spoil him to distraction although after a while he may wonder if you are up to something.

Tease him when you are out in public. If you are at a restaurant, give his hand a massage under the table and watch how he tries to hold his concentration on the conversation.  Send him cheeky I owe you messages such as a promise to dress up in his favorite outfit or do something naughty to really turn him on.

Surprise him with a weekend away. Men love surprises too but often are expected to be the ones to arrange them.   This way you are showing him you fully understand how to be a sweet girlfriend.

Show consideration to his mates. If you live together, invite them round one evening and leave them some beers, food and dips to enjoy with the game.  Your man will be very impressed and his friends will be envious.

You may be reading this thinking that I have taken things too far but the fact is that if you don't learn how to be a sweet girlfriend at least some of the time you are unlikely to progress to being a wife. In fact your progression will probably be to the status of ex girlfriend.  That of course is fine if you do want to lose the man in your life but seeing as you asked the question I am guessing that's not the case.  If you have a history of not making relationships work, perhaps now you have discovered why.

Do yourself a favor and start practicing now before it is too late. It is a lot easier to try to impress your boyfriend than it is to impress your ex.

How To Be Sweet To Your Girlfriend And Still Be A Man

If you are asking how to be sweet to your girlfriend, it is a good sign that you want to keep her happy.  Keeping a woman happy is not always easy but with a little work and effort, you will be fine. 

So what can you do?  Telling her you love her is one step but avoid over saying it as the words become meaningless.  Try telling her in other ways such as leaving a note under her pillow or sending her a message when she is not expecting it.  You could send her a card despite the fact it is not her birthday, your anniversary or any other special occasion.  Make a list of all the reasons why you love her and stick it somewhere like inside her fridge or just inside the washing machine.  She may not notice it for a few days but when she does she will light up like a candle.

Find a book of poetry and write her out a love poem. She will love it.  When you are out and about, put your arm around her waist as it shows that you are proud to be seen with her.  If she is upset, listen to her and try to reassure her without giving her the impression that you don't think she will be able to sort out the problem on her own.

Complement her not just when she has dressed up for a special occasion but when she is just lounging around relaxing. Find things that you love about her, her tousled hair, her long legs, the back of her neck etc and tell her how lovely she is.  Girls love complements especially when they are not expected.  If she is trying to lose pounds, tell her she looks really slim today. 

Never put your girl down or make unkind remarks about her even in the middle of an argument. Sure, sometimes is it hard not to get personal but try your best.  Apologize if you do say something hurtful and don't do it again.

Don't forget to tell her how happy she makes you and how much your life has improved with her in it.  Arrange surprises for her.  Take her to a chick flick or a musical or the theater even if you would prefer to have your eyeballs stapled.  Doing things for the lady in your life will end up making you both happier.  Shared memories make relationships stronger and help you both get through the bad days.

In case you run out of ideas on how to be sweet to your girlfriend, find a great book on relationships and read it. If you really love this woman you don't want to lose her over something silly.  Women leave men for all sorts of reasons and cheating is only one of them. They leave if they feel unappreciated or taken for granted.  Don't let this happen to you as great partners don't come around every day.

How To Be A Confident Girlfriend Without Being Over Confident

How To Be A Confident Girlfriend Without Being Over Confident

How to be a confident girlfriend is something every woman needs to learn to be.  There are very few men out there who like a woman who is lacking in self confidence.  They tend to be needy and always need reassuring. This can be quite a turn off when it goes on for any length of time.

Sure we all have days when we feel awful. I am positive that even Carmen Electra wakes up some mornings feeling less than gorgeous but you do not need to tell the world about it.   Men love confident women as they know that when they get them into bed, they won't be afraid to ask for what they want.  Also confidence is power and some men love powerful women. But don't go overboard as confidence does not mean that you have to be arrogant.  Yes there is a fine line but it is one that doesn't need to be crossed.

So how do you build your self esteem?  You can do this in a number of ways but the most effective is to practice positive thinking. It is hard to feel low and ugly when you are walking around with a big smile on your face.  Make a list of your good points and see how many things you have to feel grateful for.  Be genuinely thankful for what you do have as then you may see even more of the positives that are already part of your life.

If you experienced something in your life that has affected your confidence then get some help.  Counseling is a wonderful way of working through past demons and learning how to leave the past where it belongs i.e. behind you. You can't change what happened but you can change your reaction to these events and how it affects your future.

Fake it for a while. Pretend you are the most confident woman in the world. Your subconscious can't tell the difference between a lie and the truth so if you fake it for long enough, you will start believing and your self esteem levels will improve.

Ask your man why he is with you but not in a whiny type of way. You can ask him to tell you what he most loves about you? What he thinks your best assets are? Also choose your moment with care, this is not a post sex question.

Ask your friends to write down a list of your nicest characteristics. I am sure you will be pleasantly surprised at how people value you and what qualities they think you have.  Practice being assertive and reward yourself for the successes you have achieved in life.  If there is something you are really afraid of, why not try it today?

Perhaps you are afraid of heights, so try booking a hang gliding course.  Ask your boyfriend to come with you. Maybe do it as a charity fundraiser. Once you face your fears and conquer them, you will no longer have to ask how to be a confident girlfriend. Your inner self confidence will shine like a beacon.

How To Be An Amazing Girlfriend Without Being Wonder Woman

How To Be An Amazing Girlfriend Without Being Wonder Woman

The good news is that it is fairly simple to answer how to be an amazing girlfriend. You just need to know certain tricks and soon he will worship the ground you walk on. 

Often when we get involved with a man, we start to become comfortable.  We stop dressing as well as we once did and leave waxing and other grooming a little bit longer than we should.  This is the first step to being amazing. You never want him to see you looking anything other than your best.  Yes ladies this means that the fluffy nightwear stays firmly in the closest and the sexy black negligee is neatly folded under the pillow.

This brings us to the next step. You have to have a very active and interesting sex life in order to gain the amazing girlfriend award.  Seriously now is the time to be reading Karma Sutra cover to cover and putting some of the easier moves into practice.  Men love a great time in bed but they like it even better when they turn their partner on so if he does make it obvious. Yes think the dinner scene from when Harry met Sally!  Initiate sex and be open to trying different techniques and positions.  Obviously you shouldn't do anything you are uncomfortable with but forget the missionary position every night. That's predictable and boring and doesn't merit the description of amazing.

Let you man out with his friends and don't call or text to find out where he is or who he is with. Men hate clingy insecure women. They don't mind you being a little jealous if some glamor puss flirts with him but they expect you to trust them when they are on a night out.

If you want to be a permanent fixture in your man's life, you need to treat his family and friends with respect. Sure they may not be the people you would chose to socialize with.  I am guessing if you were honest, some of your own family wouldn't meet this criteria either.   Your man's family will be important to him. In fact you should have already checked how he treats his mum as that is a good indication of how he will treat you in years to come.

It may be easy to answer the question how to be an amazing girlfriend but I am not saying that it will always be easy to put it into practice. But if you master at least some of these techniques you have more chance of moving onto the next step in your relationship.  If you think that this is all too much effort, you may just find that your man has plenty of other female friends just waiting for the chance to prove they have what it takes to be an amazing girlfriend.

If you love this man and want to be walking down the street holding hands when you are in your twilight years, you need to take action now. Go on - what have you got to lose?

Advice On Love To Save Your Relationship

Advice On Love To Save Your Relationship

Today we are faced with so many things coming at us from so many directions. With all these stresses in life it's tough to keep our relationships strong, and if you want to save your relationship, just finding the time to work on it can be a challenge. This article will give you advice on love to save your relationship, it's aimed at all the overly stressed busy people who still want to make their relationships work.

Here are 3 things you can start doing today to keep your relationship strong, or pull it back from the brink. It's not so much about how much time you spend together, it's more about the quality of time that the two of you spend together. Keep that in mind when going over the list:

1. Figure out what activities that the two of you like to do as a couple. It doesn't matter if it's round of golf or a trip to the local movie theater. As long as you can share an experience that is enjoyable, for both of you. When it's your time, make arrangements for the kids to spend the night at grandma's, turn off the cell phones and Blackberries, take the phone off the hook, and turn off the t.v. This is about connecting with each other, not just co-existing in the same place at the same time.

This is so important for two reasons. One, it will allow you time to relax and unwind from the stresses of life. That will help each of you individually and also will allow both of you to bring more to the relationship since you'll be more relaxed and at ease. And two, it gives the two of you precious memories that you can relive from time to time with each other. It's fun to have shared experiences where you can say 'remember when we did...'? That creates a deeper bond between the two of you.

2. So many couples only talk about mundane daily things like asking your spouse if they had a good day, or if they picked up milk on the way home. Try to make time each week to really talk. Don't turn it into a complaining time, just talk. Tell your partner about your dreams, relive some fun past times, etc. Make it a positive time. Really be willing to talk, and listen, and let each other into your minds a little bit.

3. Try to always remind yourself what it was that first attracted you to your partner. Was it their laugh, their offbeat sense of humor, their goofy expressions? Whatever it was don't let yourself forget that. And while you're reminding yourself, make sure to let them know too. If you fell in love with their laugh, tell them, often, that you love the way they laugh. So much of that positive reinforcement seems to go out the window the longer the relationship goes on. And that's a shame. Everyone wants to feel loved and appreciated, don't ever let your partner feel like you don't find that thing you fell in love with attractive anymore.

A loving relationship is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Many people will tell you that relationships are 'hard' and that they 'take a lot of work'. I don't agree. I believe that if you are with the right person, if you're both mature adults who really want to make the relationship work, and if you know what to look out for, your relationship can be very easy. Just use this advice on love to save your relationship as a starting point.

5 Tips For Fixing A Broken Relationship

Many relationships run into problem areas. At some point, your relationship, no matter how good, will have issues. These issues can be easy to work on. Some relationships can have bigger issues, however. These issues are much more difficult too work around. If you are working on fixing a broken relationship, you need to be sure to be cautious. You want to make sure that you take all of the necessary steps to fix what has been broken.

1. Identify the Problem

The first tip that will help you to fix your broken relationship is to fully identify the problem. Both of the people in the relationship need to have a complete understanding of the state of the relationship. If there was a specific event that caused the issue, you both should understand how that happened. If it was a series of events, you need to clearly define the issues and what caused them.

2. Let Them Know How You Feel

The second tip to fix your broken relationship is to be honest and open about how you feel. A relationship can only work if there is strong communication. You need to be open about how you feel. Be careful with your woods, but do not sugar coat your feelings.

Do not hide any of your feelings. You need to let the other person, in the relationship, know your emotions. Be descriptive. Are you angry? Upset? Sad? Mad? Disappointed? The more descriptive you can be, the more your partner will understand you.

3. Pay Attention

You need to be sure to pay attention to how they feel as well. Communication goes both ways. Listen to how descriptive they are about their feelings. Ask penetrating and specific questions to better understand how they feel. By doing so you will grasp the root of the primary problem.

4. Small Gifts

Small gifts can be a perfect way to start to mend a broken relationship. While it will not fix everything, it will show that you care, and that you are thinking of them.

5. Small Dates

Going on small, inexpensive but fun dates can also be beneficial. Having fun together is the perfect way to start to mend broken hearts and a broken relationship.

You need to make sure that you both fully understand the issue at hand. IF you are working on fixing a broken relationship, you need to be on the same page. From this point, you need to let them know how you feel. Be open about how you feel about the situation, and what you think can help it. Be sure to pay attention to what they have to say as well.

When you are sure that you are both on the same wavelength, you need to pay attention to the small things. Small gifts and small dates, especially gifts and dates with more meaning, are a good way to start to mend the relationship. You need to remind yourselves why you are in the relationship. This will help you to fix your broken relationship.