Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Warning Signs - Emotional Affair - Spot Them Qucikly


If you are worried about your spouse and fear that you see some warning signs emotional affair than there are a few things that you can be on the lookout for. Just remember that it's very easy to let your imagination run away with you. You have to be careful to not see things that aren't really there.

Many of the tips I'm about to give you can be signs of an affair but they can also be innocent and may not mean a thing. Just don't risk making things worse by assuming something that may not be the case. If something seems wrong don't accuse your spouse, instead open a dialog with them and ask them about your concerns.

In some ways emotional affairs can be the most damaging. It may actually be a little easier to forgive a physical indiscretion since it didn't mean anything anyway, but an emotional connection with another person is particularly upsetting and hard to get over.

Here are a few possible indicators that something is going on:

Your spouse suddenly starts working out or has a sudden interest in wearing new and nicer clothes. Again, this might be totally innocent but if it seems like it is coming out of the blue than it may be a sign of trouble.
  1. If your spouse seems to be spending a lot more time at work than normal. A lot of sudden overtime may be a sign that something is going on. Keep your eyes open and don't accuse, but it can't hurt to talk.
  2. If your spouse suddenly starts talking about a co worker a lot. If all of a sudden you are hearing your spouse talk about the same person and there is a lot of affection in their tone, it may be a sign of an emotional affair. Sometimes an emotional affair can sneak up on people. Even if your spouse is starting to have feelings for someone, they may not realize just what is going on yet; all the more reason to not jump down their throats.
  3. If your spouse is suddenly very private about their phone conversations and computer habits, it is a strong indicator that they are doing something they don't want you to know about. You need to find out what that "something" is (or who it is).

It's all too easy to slowly have an attraction grow between two people who spend a lot of time together and have a lot in common. That's why work place affairs happen so often. But before you run off and accuse your spouse of something that you think they have done, you had better be sure or you can really make a mess of your marriage.

Looking for warning signs emotional affair? If you are at that point it's very likely that something has happened to make you suspicious. You know the saying "where there's smoke there's fire" so assuming that you aren't just overly paranoid and jealous, by the time you start to get suspicious it's likely that there is something happening.

But before you run off and accuse your spouse of something that you think they have done, you had better be sure or you can really make a mess of your marriage.



Emotional Infidelity-Another Way You Can Cheat



Emotional infidelity may sound like a strange concept but it is real. We are raised to believe that cheating is when you have sexual relations with another person outside of your relationship, but that is not the only way you can cheat.

There is also an emotional affair. An emotional affair is when you share your intimate feelings with someone other then your partner. Do not mistake this for simply having friends or the way you love your kids, it is something entirely different.

Essentially the feelings you have for your partner are what create the emotional backbone for a relationship. But what happens when you have similar feelings for someone else? This is emotional infidelity and it can be just as harmful as a physical affair.

When someone is in a relationship they like to believe that they are the center of their partners universe. They want to believe they are special and that the love for them is not something that can just be passed around.

That is what makes sexual affairs so harmful, it is not just the fact that you were physically intimate with another person. It is that you were emotionally intimate as well. Physical relations are something you share with someone you deeply care about, so to do so with another shows you care for them and this can really hurt your partner.

That is why an emotional affair often leads to a physical one. But even if it never progresses to that level it can still hurt. Nobody wants to feel like they are replaceable or something to be discarded once used.

An emotional affair can start innocent enough. It can be something as simple as getting a good impression from someone and developing that relationship further. The breaking point from when it stops being a normal relationship to something more intimate is when you let your guard down and ignore the boundaries we often set for ourselves.

There are lines that separate people, we place them into different categories. There are friends, family, lovers all of whom you care deeply for but in different ways. The emotional infidelity comes in when you blur the lines between groups. When you start caring for someone as more then just a friend and more as a lover.

It is important to stay within the lines and not to carelessly hand out your love. One of the best ways to determine if you may have crossed the line is to ask yourself a simple question. Do you confide in someone more then your partner?

It is not a clear cut question since there are some secrets you do not want your partner to know. But generally if you share everything with someone other then your partner, this could be a problem. Trust is fundamental for a relationship and if you trust someone more then your partner, it might lead to further problems down the road.

An emotional affair is a tricky business and it is not as clear cut as a physical affair. You just need to try your best not to mix your feelings and ensure that a friend just remains a friend.








Emotional Infidelity - Is It Trouble In The Making



We don't live in a bubble. We spend time out in the world with other people and sometimes we make a connection with those other people. This is great, and a wonderful part of life. But it can become emotional infidelity when you are being more intimate with this new person than you are with your partner, even if it isn't sexual.  It may be hard to draw the line sometimes but if you find that you are thinking of another person a lot, and not just in a casual way, it may be that you need to assess your own relationship.

It's very common that this type of emotional affair will eventually lead to a sexual relationship. That's one of the main reasons it needs to be nipped in the bud right away. There is no reason to beat yourself up about it just because you happened to meet someone and found that the two of you had an amazing attraction. What you do need to do, however, is to recognize that any type of infidelity is wrong and you need to put a stop to it before it goes any further.

The longer you allow yourself to spend time with this other person, the stronger the attraction will become and the harder it will be to resist temptation, or break things off. If you are sharing things with this new person about your relationship with your spouse, you've crossed a line. It's one thing to confide some things to your friends, but not someone you are attracted to.  Doing so will only create bigger problems for you and create an 'unnatural' bond with the new person.

Your spouse is the person you should be sharing these issues with, not someone who you are having feelings for. That is a breach of the trust you and your partner share.  By letting this other person in, more and more every time the two of you talk, you are distancing yourself from your partner.  If you do that for too long, your main relationship will completely fall apart. And even though you may think that's what you want so you can have the new person, it rarely works out quite so neatly. 

It's unbelievably easy to make more out of the time you spend with your new friend. After all, the two of you don't bicker, you don't have any issues with money or how to deal with the kids, etc. The day to day things that can drag us all down aren't shared by the two of you so of course things may seem wonderful. Just remember, they felt that way at first with your spouse too.  It's inevitable. But don't confuse that with having found your soul mate. Your soul mate is more than likely the person waiting for you at home.

Emotional infidelity is very often the first step to a full fledged affair. It's very easy to have a connection with someone else, but when that connection seems to take on a life of it's own, you need to pull back before things get so far out of hand that you can't salvage the situation.


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